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Could James Haskell's banter derail the Lions?

haskell

In the run up to the 2003 Rugby World England head coach Sir Clive Woodward emphasized the importance of detail, and took addressing the minutiae of the England’s game to the next level.

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To paraphrase the philosophy – ‘If we do 100 things one per cent better’ we will be victorious. Indeed Woodward cited the importance of ‘critical non – essentials’ (CNEs), believing them to be key to England’s World Cup success in 2003.

Yet what about negative one percenters? The tiny things – that individually seem negligible – but that collectively can lead to the downfall of a team.

The enormous touring party, the individual hotel rooms for players and the presence of former Labour spin doctor Alastair Campbell were all widely considered detrimental in Woodward’s failed 2005 Lions tour.

Fast forward to the present day.

Enter James Haskell and the British and Irish Lions.

Haskell has been touted as that oldest of rugby clichés – the “good tourist” – he may not be pushing for a test place but he’s a good guy to have around camp.

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Indeed many fans – this one included – are looking forward to the prospect of Haskell’s videos surfacing on social media over the course Lions tour, not least how his relationship with reluctant ‘best mate’ Owen Farrell develops.

Yet is there a negative side effect to having Haskell – and more specifically Haskell’s overwhelming level of banter – in the squad?

Haskell is the type of character that the game of Rugby Union needs. Colourful, brash and with a quick turn of phrase, the self proclaimed ‘Bishop of Banterbury’ prides himself on mixing it with the best chatters in the business.

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But what people don’t like to talk about is the unspoken tyranny of banter. For banter bullies, if you possess ‘s*** banter’, then it’s a massive slight on your personality.

Haskell himself has frequently alluded to his own lack of tolerance for people who don’t have ‘good banter’. In a video addressed to his fans in March he unashamedly spoke of blocking anyone with ‘s*** comments, s*** banter, terrible chat’.

It would seem if the Bantersaurus Rex deems your banter unworthy, you don’t get a seat at the ‘banter table’.

Such are the whims of a banter tyrant.

And what of his British and Irish Lions teammates? It’s not impossible to imagine quieter players being intimidated by a perceived need to give and take banter.

It may come as a shock to some, but not everyone is good at banter, and not everyone likes it to start with.

Let’s hope for the sake of a competitive series that banter doesn’t become an overarching distraction in one of the most grueling Lions tours ever conceived.

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fl 2 hours ago
Why Les Kiss and Stuart Lancaster can lead Australia to glory

“Why do you downplay his later career, post 50? He won a treble less than two years ago, with a club who played more games and won more games than any other team that managed the same feat. His crowning achievement - by his own admission.”

He’s won many trebles in his career - why do you only care about one of them?

I think its unsurprising that he’d feel more emotional about his recent achievements, but its less clear why you do.


“Is it FA cups or League cups you’re forgetting in his English trophy haul? You haven’t made that clear…”

It actually was clear, if you knew the number he had won of each, but I was ignoring the league cup, because Germany and Spain only have one cup competition so it isn’t possible to compare league cup performance with City to his performance with Bayern and Barcelona.


“With Barcelona he won 14 trophies. With Bayern Munich he won 5 trophies. With City he has currently won 18 trophies…”

I can count, but clearly you can’t divide! He was at Barca for 4 years, so that’s 3.5 trophies per year. He was at Bayern for 3 years, and actually won 7 trophies so that’s 2.3 trophies per year. He has been at City for 8 completed seasons so that’s 2.25 trophies per year. If in his 9th season (this one) he wins both the FA cup and the FIFA club world cup that will take his total to 20 for an average of 2.22 trophies per year.


To be clear - you said that Pep had gotten better with age by every metric. In fact by most metrics he has gotten worse!

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f
fl 4 hours ago
Why Les Kiss and Stuart Lancaster can lead Australia to glory

“He made history beyond the age of 50. History.”

He made history before the age of 50, why are you so keen to downplay Pep’s early career achievements? In 2009 he won the sextuple. No other manager in history had achieved that, and Pep hasn’t achieved it since, but here you are jizzing your pants over a couple of CL finals.


“If continuing to break records and achieve trophies isn't a metric for success”

Achieving trophies is a metric for success, and Pep wins fewer trophies as he gets older.


“He's still competing for a major trophy this year. Should he get it, it would be 8 consecutive seasons with a major trophy. Then the world club cup in the summer.”

You’re cherry picking some quite odd stats now. In Pep’s first 8 seasons as a manager he won 6 league titles, 2 CL titles, & 4 cup titles. In Pep’s last 8 seasons as a manager (including this one) he’s won 6 league titles, 1 CL title, & 2 (or possibly 3) cup titles. In his first 8 seasons he won the FIFA world club cup 3 times; in his last 8 seasons he’s won it 1 (or possibly soon to be 2) time(s). In his first 8 seasons he won the UEFA super cup 3 times; in his last 8 he won the UEFA super cup once. His record over the past 8 seasons has been amazing - but it is a step down from his record in his first 8 seasons, and winning the FA cup and FIFA club world cup this summer won’t change that.


Pep is still a brilliant manager. He will probably remain a brilliant manager for many years to come, but you seem to want to forget how incredible he was when he first broke through. To be clear - you said that Pep had gotten better with age by every metric. That was false!

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