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Why Zinzan Brooke has got it wrong about Lions back rower Taulupe Faletau

By Lee Calvert
Taulupe Faletau (Photo: Getty Images)

Zinny thinks Taulupe Faletau lacks "mongrel edge" – but Lee Calvert argues the Bath and Wales number 8 is more than good enough without it.

As the Aviva Premiership season limped towards its predictable playoffs line-up this week, one player's performance stood out and forced the Lions' waiting hosts to take notice. Taulupe Faletau.

It’s been a difficult couple of weeks for New Zealand as they try to process the news that their terrifyingly good captain and number 8 Kieran Read is injured and a chance to miss at least one, if not all, of the Lions Tests. This is on top of some doubt over Jerome Kaino. While replacements have never been an issue for All Black teams generally – after all, any team that can allow Stephen Donald to win a World Cup must have quite a system in place – there will be some modicum of worry that two of their starting back row are shaky.

At this difficult time, step forward Taulupe Faletau of Bath, Wales and the 2017 Lions, who scored a hat-trick in his club’s demolishing of their west country rivals and inexplicable shambles Gloucester. This latest performance merely cemented his excellence in a season that, let’s not forget, he missed a large chunk of due to injury, including most of the Six Nations.

It is perhaps no coincidence that the timing of the injury to Read aligned with Faletau’s brilliance led All Black legend Zinzan Brooke to cast doubt on the Lions eight’s value.

"Someone who I do have reservations about is Welsh loose forward Taulupe Faletau," Brooke said in column for allblacks.com.

"It's not that he isn't a good player, he just isn't a key player. He's one of these guys that is pretty much good at everything, but doesn't have that mongrel edge. To translate what Zinzan is saying here: “he’s good, but he’s not enough of an arsehole”. Does he have a point?

Zinzan is a great of the game, a hugely talented player that brought a lot more that simply being a bastard on the field. At heart he is an Old School Rugby Man™. These men have many tales of physical atrocity to regale the after dinner circuit with. Stuff like, “I remember the time Johnno punched me in the cock 12 times in the ruck so I fish-hooked him and used his face like a bowling ball.” Or “Fitzy once pulled a bloke’s heart out of his chest and held it in front of the bloke’s face so he could see how black it was before he died. We laughed about that for ages.”

In their day, forwards in particular simply had to be arseholes to get the job done, otherwise they would have been trampled by their opponents like a rampaging horde of barbarians.

Rugby today still needs some element of this, of course, but the balance of a team is far more important. Faletau may be as far removed from the archetypal nasty bastard as it’s possible to be, but that does not diminish his key role in each of his teams.

Faletau is perhaps a victim of making the game look too easy. He rarely looks out of breath, he never grimaces and he is generally a quiet and serene presence on the field. Usually he looks like he is gently floating in a swimming pool with a mimosa rather than running into other very large men at high speed.

But do not fall into the trap of assuming this reduces his effort or effectiveness. He’s a magnificent athlete who consistently breaks the gainline, which he can do either using his force or his sublime feet. He is ever-present in defence, both in the line and in cover. He wins his fair share of turnovers, has a magnificent engine and, as he demonstrated at the weekend, can get over the tryline as well. He has been the first name on the teamsheet for Wales for a number of years for these very reasons.

Some players need to be an arsehole or at least become that character on the field in order to perform. Maro Itoje is increasingly assuming this role for club and country and is thriving on it. Faletau does not, he simply gets on with being the most important player in the fifteen.

Perhaps most importantly, it is impossible to intimidate him. Sledge him and he will remain impassive, come at him physically and he will outdo you in most things, give him a sly dig and he will phlegmatically ignore it. All of which will lead to the same outcome: an excellent performance from a supremely talented player. "Mongrel edge” has little to do with it.

Zinzan and the rest of New Zealand would do well to take that into consideration.

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